Tuesday, October 29, 2013

My Sister Cat, The Evil Millie

Hi Everyone, Mabel here.
This is me, Mabel, showing everyone what wonderful shape I am in. I'm with my favorite toy duck
Questions! I get asked many questions in my fan emails. After I mentioned my Evil Cat Sister, Millie (and her evil cat daughter, Agnes) in my last blog post, many readers want to know how she came to live with us and why I think she is so evil.
Come on, can't you tell she is evil just by looking at her?
Look at those eyes.
Look at her claws.
Here is a picture of Millie the day she says she was abandoned with her kitten. 

See how small and skinny she was? But look at her eyes. Even then, they were cold and calculating. (Calculating what? I don't know; it's just an expression).
Here is a picture of her today:
As you can see, she's "filled out" a bit. (Yes, it is the same cat).
Maggie, my supersmart big sister, told me about the day Millie, then known as simply, "Mama Cat," was "found."
Maggie, who was then just a pup, was hanging out in the back yard with her older sister, the now dearly departed Katie Dachshund. Suddenly, Maggie spotted something moving in the far back corner of her backyard. Being a brave Dachshund (are there any other kind?), Maggie ran to see what had invaded her yard. (She really regrets this now).
She saw a small kitten boldly walking along "her" fence.
Well, Maggie started singing the song of our people. I mean, she barked. And barked. And Barked.
Mama #1 looked to see what was going on. She saw two brave and wonderful dachshunds protecting their backyard from the evil invading kitten and her domineering Mother (the evil cat, now known as Millie).
Mama #1 panicked --- did she really think Maggie was cold and heartless and would hurt those little cats? Of course, being a Stray Animal Addict, Mama #2 came running to rescue the evil cat Millie (and her evil daughter, Agnes).
The next thing Maggie knew, there were two strays living in her laundry room! Of course, Maggie tried very very hard to tell the Mamas that Millie (who was then known as simply, "Mama Cat") was evil and needed to go away. 
And Mama #2 did try to give Mama Cat and Agnes away. No one wanted them. 
For weeks, every Saturday and Sunday, the two strays were sent to a place called "Petsmart" with instructions to find a new home. They were supposed to be interviewed by people who wanted a cat/kitten. 
They failed. Over and over and over and over again.
Maggie says they failed on purpose.
At home, "Mama Cat" was kind and loving. Even the neighbors fell for her "nice cat" act.
Maggie says that Mama Cat would act very mean when she was interviewed for a new home. She would growl and hiss at the other cats. She'd even hiss at Agnes, her own kitten!
After  months of failed interviews, someone (foolish person!) tried to pick Mama Cat up. Mama Cat had been waiting weeks for this, and she screamed at the top of her lungs (She really didn't scream from the top of her lungs, it's just an expression. She really just screamed from her evil fanged mouth). Well, everyone in the entire store stopped what they were doing and rushed over to help the poor cat who just screamed (no one had hurt her -- if they had, the evil cat would have left evil cat marks all over them).
Mama #2 realized that day that "Mama Cat" was never going to be adopted, so she left to take Mama Cat home. Right after she left, the adoption people called her and asked her to come and get Agnes and said not to bring her back; She had just bitten someone. Agnes failed her interviews, too.
On purpose.
Now, Mama #2 was stuck with two evil, scheming cats. She just didn't know they were evil. Mama Cat had not revealed her true evilness yet.
Mama #2 is pretty naive about cat personalities. She falls under their spell very easily.
Over the months she tried to get Mama Cat and Agnes adopted, she'd grown very fond of them.
Poor Maggie was now stuck with 2 new (evil) cat sisters.
Harley and I cautiously walking by the Evil Cat Millie. I'm the one on the right (just in case you can't tell us apart).
Tomorrow, I'll tell how the Evil Mama Cat became the Evil Cat Millie.

1 comment:

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