Friday, November 29, 2013

Diva Diet, Day 2

This is me, Mabel, looking tired and weary after two days of dieting.

Diva Diet, Day 2.
Today was a very long day.
My Mamas left this morning as usual. They left that new, nasty, tasteless diet dog food in all of the bowls again.
I was hungry.
Really hungry.
But not hungry enough to eat that food.
So, I waited for Mama #2 to come home mid-day like she always does.
She didn't come home.
I sat in my den and sulked. I had my mid-day break all planned out.

"This is me, Mabel. I'm starving. Can't you hear my stomach growling? I can barely move, I am so hungry. No, I won't go outside with you;  I'm too hungry. No, I won't even go into the dining room with you; I am too hungry."

I thought she might be convinced and give me a treat or something delicious. But she didn't even come home mid-day.
I waited. It got late. It got dark.
I was starting to consider eating that dry, tasteless dog food. I walked to the nearest food bowl and it was empty. I went to the next bowl, empty! "There's no food left," my super smart sarcastic stepsister Maggie laughed. "Harley and me and our sister cats ate it. All of it. Too bad you're going to starve to death soon." Then, Maggie turned her back on me and walked away. 
 I really was going to starve! I almost lost my Diva composure and started to panic.
Then, I remembered the pecan trees in the back yard.
I went outside to find a few pecans to eat. I found nothing at all. Nothing!
This is me, Mabel, searching desperately for a pecan to eat.
I went back inside to sleep. I thought I might die in my sleep ----yes, I was that hungry.
Finally, the Mamas finally came home.
I did my "Mama's home dance" with my dog sisters. Then, I quickly laid down to show I was really starving to death and had zero energy.
Mama #1 went into the dog room and came back with a bowl of food. 
The Diet Food! No!
She gave me a piece. I dropped it on the couch. She gave me another piece. I dropped it on the couch. She gave Harley a bite and then gave Maggie a bite. Maggie looked over at me, "Not eating again? You are one stupid Diva Dog!" She leaned over and snatched the two pieces of food I'd dropped on the couch. Then she snickered.
OK. It appeared I was going to starve if I didn't eat this diet stuff. So, I ate the next bite. I just swallowed it. Whole. 
Mama #1 gave me another piece. I tried chewing this one, because I just couldn't swallow another piece without chewing it up.
The Mamas won.
I ate the diet food.
It was good.
I mean, it was really, really good! No wonder my sisters and my cat sisters had emptied the food bowls! This was really good stuff!
I had to stop myself from gulping down all of the food in the bowl.
I let Mama #1 feed it to me, piece by piece. I couldn't let her think she'd won. I'll eat my usual bowl of food tomorrow.
But tonight, after Mama #1 finished hand feeding me, 


Life is good again.
Your favorite Diva,
This is me, Mabel, finally feeling relaxed and happy after eating my ham and turkey.

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